Purple Bubbles
by Rynne Lupin
Summary: After a night of getting chased around by Acromantulas and such in the Forbidden Forest, Sirius and Remus get muddy and very annoyed at James. SLASH (RLSB)


Disclaimer: You don't really think I own the puppies, do you?

Summary: While looking for ingredients in the Forbidden Forest for a prank on Snape, Sirius and Remus get dirty.  Then they take a bath.  SLASH! (Remus/Sirius)

Warnings: This is a hard PG-13 for implied nudity and sex.  No actual descriptions of either the nudity or the sex are in this story.  If you want the full NC-17 version, check out the link in my bio.

Author's Notes: This was originally written for the SB/RL Fuh-Q-Fest, for the challenge "one bathes the other".  If you want to read some more very good Remus/Sirius stories, check out the FQF.  You can get there from the link to my story in my bio.

~*~

Sirius was bored.  And as Remus, James and Peter knew very, _very_ well, a bored Sirius was a dangerous Sirius.  So Remus, in a moment of desperation designed to keep Sirius from very creatively finding things to do, and which he was sure he would regret later, suggested they play a prank on Snape.  James and Peter agreed, of course, because as Marauders they were always amenable to the idea of pranking Snape, but Sirius was in his element.  Sirius, in fact, was so taken with the idea that he grabbed Remus by the shoulders and planted a kiss right on his mouth, causing Remus to blush bright red and James and Peter to whoop and catcall.

            "Right then." Sirius was very excited at the alleviation of his boredom, especially when it was a prank on Snape, and _especially_ when it was not only sanctioned by Mr. Moony the Prefect, but was in fact the whole _idea_ of Mr. Moony the Prefect.  So Sirius was happy.  "What are we going to do to our esteemed Snivellus?"

            "I found a good potion in a library book," James remarked thoughtfully.  "It's supposed to turn a person's skin orange, hair blue, and make him burp singing purple bubbles."

            The other three looked at each other and burst into laughter.  "That's…great!" Peter gasped, wiping tears of laughter from the corner of his eyes.

            "I can just picture it!" Sirius exclaimed.  "Snape, the blue-haired, bubble-mouthed pumpkin!  And the look on his _face_!" They dissolved into laughter again, each picturing the sulky scowl the greasy-haired Slytherin would be sporting once they pulled it off.

            Once Remus sat up from where he had fallen on Sirius, he asked, "James, what do we need for this potion?"

            James pushed himself up off the floor, taking a deep breath to calm himself.  He dug around in a pocket of his robes, pulling out a crumpled piece of parchment and smoothing it out so the others could see it.  It was a list of ingredients, which included several things that Remus knew could be found in the student store-cupboard, but a few of which couldn't.

            "Hmm…we can find these in the Forbidden Forest," Sirius commented, pointing to the three things that weren't in the student store-cupboard.  With a sinking feeling in his stomach, Remus realized what that meant…

            "We're going into the Forest!" James exclaimed gleefully, and Sirius and James exchanged grins.  Sirius and James loved going into the Forest, though Remus wasn't quite sure of whether it was because they were thrilling in the forbidden, loved the dangerous aspects, or a mixture of both.  _/Probably both,/_ Remus decided.  _/After all, they run with a werewolf every month./  _Remus himself liked the Forest well enough, but he preferred being there in his animal form.  Humans were prey to many of the Forest's inhabitants, but not many things would mess with a werewolf.

            "We'll have to be human," Remus mused aloud.  "Or at least, I need to be human.  We need hands to get these and bring them back, so it can't be on a full moon or I could bite the person using their hands."

            "Right," Sirius nodded, and James and Peter agreed.  "When are we going, then?"

            "Moon's in two weeks," Peter said, "and tomorrow's Friday, so why not tomorrow night?"

            "Tomorrow night's good," James said.  "How are we going to go about finding this stuff?"  Remus bit his lip, thinking, but it was Sirius who had an idea.

            "Let's split up," Sirius suggested.  "I can go with Remus and James can go with Peter, and we can be in contact through our mirrors."

            James rolled his eyes.  "You just want to go with Moony so you can snog in peace," James accused, but Remus could tell he didn't really mind.

            Sirius sniffed.  "I'm hurt, Prongs," Sirius sniffed again.  "Are you accusing me of using the prank as a way to snog Moony's socks off?"  Remus blushed.  He was still a little embarrassed when anyone talked about how close he and Sirius were in public, even among friends in their own dorm.

            "Are you telling me you would keep your hands to yourself while alone in a secluded spot?" James asked skeptically.  Remus turned redder, which Sirius immediately picked up on.

            "Aw, Prongs, you're embarrassing him!" Sirius said, ruffling Remus's hair.  Remus batted his hand away, muttering that he wasn't embarrassed, which no one believed.

            James snorted.  "You're embarrassing him too, Sirius.  Probably worse than I am, for that matter."

            Sirius put an arm around Remus, smiling charmingly.  "Am I worse than James, Moony?" Sirius asked earnestly, turning on the puppy dog eyes.

            "You're as bad as each other," Remus told him wryly.  Sirius only grinned, not even trying to deny it.  James and Peter exchanged an amused look, smiling indulgently.  Then James threw a pillow at them.

            "Okay lovebirds, break it up.  If we're spending tomorrow night in the Forest, we need to actually get some sleep tonight," James said.  Remus grinned and slid off James's bed, where the four of them had been lounging around.  He walked over to his bed, and Sirius immediately jumped off and followed him.  James groaned.

            "When I said we need to get some sleep tonight, I _meant_ that we _actually_ need to get some sleep," James yelled at the closing bedcurtains.  Sirius stuck his head out, his hair already tousled.

            "You aren't the boss of us, you know, James," Sirius told him cheerfully, then stuck his head back in.  James groaned again, and Peter gave him a sympathetic look before heading off to his own bed.

            "Then at least use a Silencing Charm!" James yelled.  "Pete and I don't exactly want to hear what you two get up to in there!"  James listened, but no one replied, and he didn't hear any suspicious noises, so he just decided to go to sleep, and hope that Sirius and Remus did the same soon.

~*~

            The next day, the four Marauders suffered through classes, impatiently awaiting that night's forest venture.  Remus, who had not gotten much sleep the previous night, was dozing in History of Magic when he suddenly felt Sirius's bare foot creeping up his leg.  He jumped slightly, but no one even noticed except for Sirius, who grinned toothily at him and continued caressing Remus's leg with his foot.  Remus smiled suggestively at him, reaching down a bit and stroking the foot, and laughed quietly to himself when Sirius glared at him and looked uncomfortable and horny the rest of the lesson.

            Finally the evening arrived, and in order to get the most out of the night, they decided to go directly from dinner to the Forest.  After all, they didn't know how long it would take to find these ingredients.

            James had the Invisibility Cloak hidden under his robes, and Remus had the Marauder's Map in his pocket, so when they finished their dinner, the four boys slipped quietly out of the Great Hall and out of the school itself.  They slipped into a nearby shadow, and James took out the Invisibility Cloak, swirling it over himself and Remus.  Peter became Wormtail and perched on Remus's shoulder, and Sirius became Padfoot and bounded off toward the Forest to wait for the rest.  They had worked out this arrangement last year, when they realized that four boys couldn't possibly fit under one Invisibility Cloak anymore.  Even two boys was stretching it, but with Wormtail being a small animal and Padfoot being a black dog, it became much easier to sneak around.  Wormtail was inconspicuous and Padfoot could scare anyone into thinking he was a Grim, but Remus wasn't an Animagus and a stag was anything but inconspicuous, so it was Remus and James who used the Cloak.

            So when James, Remus, and Wormtail reached the eves of the Forest, Remus set Wormtail down, and then Peter and Sirius were standing before them.  James gave them a few last-minute instructions, made sure that he and Sirius had their two-way mirrors, and then they were off, James and Peter walking in one direction, Remus and Sirius in another.  Sirius grabbed Remus's hand and dragged him off, the echo of his laughter reaching James and Peter.  And as James continued deeper into the Forest with Peter, he wondered how much work Sirius and Remus would actually get done.

            But contrary to James's fears, Remus and Sirius were looking very hard indeed, stopping only every ten minutes or so to sneak a few kisses.  But soon enough they were back on track, until the moonlight in Remus's hair distracted Sirius again, or Remus stopped to admire Sirius's grace in navigating the Forest.

            It was during one of these such times that James called in to check on their progress.  In fact, Sirius was so surprised and dismayed to hear James's voice saying his name that he sprang back from Remus, tripping backwards on a root and landing in a large pile of mud.  As Remus chuckled quietly, Sirius dug the mirror out of his pocket and glared at it, mud covering the back of his robes and hair, some splattering the front of his robes and arms.

            "What do you want, James?" Sirius growled at the mirror, looking very put out at the interruption.  The reflection of James in the mirror smirked.

            "Interrupting something, am I?" James asked innocently.

            "No!" Sirius exclaimed, a little to fast for James to believe it was true.  Remus bit his lip to keep himself from laughing out loud.

            Mirror-James rolled his eyes.  "Sure, right, whatever you say," James smiled, and Sirius growled again.  "But anyway, me an' Pete found one of the poisonous fangs of the biting fire-flower, so that's one ingredient down and two more to go."

            "Right, right, now go away, James," Sirius said curtly.  "We need to be looking too."

            James rolled his eyes again.  "Ah, but the question is, _what_, or rather, _who_ will you be looking at?" And then he was gone before Sirius could say anything further.

            "Stupid James," Sirius muttered, aiming a kick at a protruding tree root.  "Always interrupting us, getting my robes and hair all muddy…"  Remus, who very wisely decided not to say anything, just nodded.  Finally Sirius stopped muttering and sighed.  "Well, let's get moving then.  We mustn't let James and Peter beat us in finding all this stuff."

            So the two boys set off again, Sirius trying to ignore all the mud, though every once in a while he'd grab some muddy hair and mutter darkly at it before releasing it and continuing their search.  Whenever he did this, Remus muffled laughter, but Sirius was so intent on his goal that he didn't even notice.

            After another hour or so of looking, both Sirius and Remus were getting a bit tired, so they decided to sit down and rest a bit under the shelter of some giant oaks.  Sirius leaned his head against the trunk of the tree they sat under and sighed.

            "I wonder how James and Pete are doing," Remus said, seating himself next to Sirius, who put an arm around his shoulders.

            "Apparently better than we are," Sirius replied sourly.  "After all, they already found one of the ingredients."

            "That doesn't mean they're going to find them all," Remus said reasonably.  "They could be having just as much trouble as we're having at the moment."

            "I hope so," Sirius said.  "James will taunt us mercilessly if he finds all three and we find none.  He'll say—hey, what's that?"

            "Hmm?" Remus blinked in confusion, looking up to see where Sirius was pointing.  Through a gap in the trees, Remus could see a bunch of bushes, none of which had been there when they first sat down.

            "Let's go see what's over there," Sirius suggested, and before Remus could do more than open his mouth to warn him of the dangers, Sirius sprang to his feet and was off towards the bushes.  Remus followed, cursing.  Didn't Sirius realize that there were dangers in going to places inside a magic forest that just appeared?

            "Sirius—bloody—wait!" Remus gasped as he ran after Sirius, who disappeared behind the bushes.  Remus pushes through them, receiving several small cuts as the thorns passed over his skin, and skidded to a stop beside Sirius.  "You idiot!" he exclaimed.  "Do you know _nothing_ about magic forests?!"

            "I found the goatsfoot," Sirius said in a pleased voice, pointing at the far end of the clearing they ended up in.  Remus looked and saw that it was, indeed, goatsfoot that was growing there.  Goatsfoot was an oddly temperamental mushroom that gave a skin disease to anyone who was foolish enough to touch it with their bare skin, and if Remus wasn't mistaken, it was this ingredient that would provide Snape with the orange skin.

            The boys walked over to where the goatsfoot was growing, taking out their wands and carefully uprooting the mushroom as Professor Bloom, their Herbology teacher, had shown them last year.  They then carefully levitated the fungi and stuffed them in bags brought specifically for that purpose.  They shared a grin of accomplishment before walking to the entrance of the clearing.  Just as they were about to leave, Remus heard a small clicking sound behind him, so he turned around to see what it was.

            Remus's eyes widened and his breath caught.  "Oh my—bloody hell!" he exclaimed.  Sirius turned around to see what Remus was looking at, and his eyes widened too.  There was an Acromantula on the other side of the clearing.  An apparently angry Acromantula, as it was furiously clicking its pincers as it advanced on the two boys.

            They ran.  They had no idea how there had gotten to be Acromantulas in the forest, or why this one was in that clearing, but they didn't care, they just ran, completely ignoring the cuts they were getting from the bushes and the leaves that were getting caught up in their hair.  They heard the gigantic spider crashing around behind them, and afraid there might be more coming, risked a glance back.  There was only one, but considering its size and speed, one would be enough to finish them off.

            Sirius fumbled with his wand in his hand, and pointing it backwards over his shoulder and shouting, "_Stupefy!_" There was a pause in the furious crashing behind them, but after only a couple seconds it started up again.  Remus, seeing what Sirius was trying to do, also pointed his wand over his shoulder, and as one, the two boys shouted, "_Stupefy!_" putting all the force they could behind the spell.  There was a loud crash that seemed to shake the forest floor behind them, and then there was silence.  They paused in their running, listening carefully for any sound that signified the Acromantula coming after them again, but when the could hear nothing, they glanced back to see if their spell had worked.

            Apparently it had.  The Acromantula lay in a sprawled heap a hundred yards or so behind them, all eight of its eyes closed, apparently unconscious.  But Remus and Sirius were not about to risk having it regain consciousness soon, so they set off running again, only stopping when they felt safe again.

            Sirius collapsed on the ground, breathing hard, and groaning, Remus joined him.  "I'm going to kill James," Sirius gasped clearly.  "Not even Snape's humiliation is worth having raving Acromantulas after us." Remus nodded vigorously.

            Finally Sirius sat up, having caught his breath.  "Better call the little wanker and tell him we have the goatsfoot," Sirius said, reluctantly taking out his mirror.  "James Potter!"

            James's smiling face appeared in the mirror, the smile faltering as soon as he saw the state Sirius was in.  "Merlin, Sear, what happened to you?" he asked in surprise.  Sirius glowered.  He was muddy, covered with cuts and bruises, leaves tangled amongst the mud in his precious hair, and he was Not In a Good Mood.

            "An angry Acromantula is what happened to me, James.  Me and Remus both," Sirius snarled.  Mirror-James's eyes widened and a scared look flitted across his face.

            "An _Acromantula?!_" James exclaimed.  "How did you meet an Acromantula?  Are you two all right?" James was clearly worried, so Sirius softened a bit.

            "Well, we found some goatsfoot in this one clearing, and just as we were about to leave, we saw the Acromantula.  It chased us, we Stunned it, and in the process we got rather dirty," Sirius explained.  James allowed a look of relief to pass his face.

            "As long as you're all right," James said.  "And you've got the goatsfoot too?"

            Sirius nodded, and James smiled again.  "That's brilliant, because Pete and I found the icicle dragon root.  His hand got a bit frozen, but we thawed it out."

            Sirius nodded, too tired to say anything more than, "So we can leave now?"  Mirror-James nodded.

            "We'll meet you near Greenhouse Three, all right?" Sirius nodded, and then James was gone, and Sirius put the mirror back in his pocket.  Remus and Sirius looked at each other before Remus dragged himself to his feet.

            "Let's get going then.  Here," Remus said, holding a hand out to Sirius, who grasped it and was pulled to his feet.  They started walking back in the direction of Hogwarts, hands still clasped together.

            They met James and Peter in the shadow of Greenhouse Three, no one seeing them considering it was about midnight.  The small sliver of the waxing crescent moon was high in the sky when they arrived.  Sirius immediately glared at James, and Peter just raised an eyebrow at Sirius's and Remus's disheveled appearances.

            "You two need a bath," Peter stated quietly.  Sirius glared at Peter too.

            "We _know_ we need a bath!" Sirius retorted.  "It's not our fault bloody Acromantulas were chasing us!"

            Peter wrinkled his nose, unconsciously reminiscent of Wormtail.  "It doesn't matter if it was your fault or not, you still stink, especially with the mud all over you."

            Remus intervened in time to stop Sirius from doing more than growling at Peter.  "Yes, we need a bath," Remus said.  "We'll go take one while you and James brew the potion." Remus handed the bag of goatsfoot to James, who accepted it with a grin.

            "Don't take too long, kiddies," James teased.  "And be sure and use a Silencing Charm.  I'd rather not be distracted when I'm trying to brew a potion."

            Remus rolled his eyes.  "Whatever," he said.  "You guys just take the Cloak and get up to Gryffindor.  Sirius and I are taking the Map."

            James raised an eyebrow.  "You're not coming up to Gryffindor with us?" he asked.  "Where are you going, then?"

            "Prefect's bathroom," Remus replied.  Sirius grinned, and James laughed.

            "Of course, of course," James said, flapping a hand.  "Go on then, you two.  Have fun."

            "Oh, we will," Remus replied, grinning.  He walked off, dragging Sirius behind him, James and Peter watching after them amusedly.

            "We really going to the prefect's bathroom?" Sirius asked.  Remus hadn't let them have the password to the prefect's bathroom since fifth year, when they left little "presents" for the Slytherin prefects.

            Remus Looked at him.  "You are not going to take advantage of hearing the password," Remus ordered, and Sirius nodded quickly.  He didn't want to make Remus mad.  Remus was _scary_ when he was mad.

            Remus dug the Map out of his pocket, tapping it with his wand and whispering, "I solemnly swear I am up to no good." Lines spidered out from the point his wand touched, becoming words and then the Map that was one of the keys to their success.  After observing that Filch and his cat were running after Peeves down in the dungeons, Remus put the Map in his pocket and set off towards the prefect's bathroom, Sirius following meekly behind.

            When they got to the prefect's bathroom, Remus muttered the password to Boris the Bewildered, low enough that Sirius couldn't hear him.  Boris stepped aside, and they entered the bathroom.

            As Remus started filling the large pool-like bathtub, Sirius looked around in appreciation.  The portrait of the mermaid was asleep, so at least she wouldn't be catcalling at them.  He remembered when Remus first took a bath here, two years ago, and how he told them, blushing, that the mermaid catcalled to him when he got out...smiling at the thought, Sirius turned to the pool, which was now full...of purple bubbles.

            Sirius blinked.  "Purple bubbles, Moony?" he asked, joining Remus at the edge of the pool.  Remus smiled devilishly.

            "Appropriate, don't you think, Mr. Padfoot?" he asked, surveying the bath.  "Considering what Snape will soon have to put up with?"

            Sirius snickered.  "Oh, I agree, Mr. Moony.  Very appropriate indeed.  Now, I really must wash my hair.  It wouldn't do to let it stink," Sirius replied, slipping out of his clothes and sliding gracefully into the water, Remus watching him appreciatively.

            Then Remus slipped off his own clothes and slid into the water, coming up behind Sirius, sliding his arms around him and holding him against him.  Sirius sighed with contentment.

            "Wash my hair, Moony?" Sirius pleaded, turning around in Remus's arms.  Remus smiled.

            "Of course," he said.  "As long as you return the favor."

            "Of course," Sirius echoed, turning around, patiently waiting for the soft touch of Remus's shampoo-lathered hands on his head.  Then the touch came and Sirius relaxed into it, leaning back against Remus with a happy sigh.  The fingers gently massaged his scalp, running over the top and through the strands of hair.  Over and over.  The hands ran through his hair, gathering it, bunching it together, then letting it fall down into the water.  The hands gently coaxed Sirius into leaning his head back, and all of his hair was submerged under the water, floating.  Remus's hands went under the water too, gently rinsing the shampoo out, then leading Sirius to a portion of the pool where he could wash all the bubbles and shampoo out of his hair.  He did so, then ran his fingers through it, glad to feel the silky strands mud-free again.

            "My turn," Remus smiled, and Sirius grinned back at him.  Sirius lathered up some shampoo in his hands and moved behind Remus, reaching forward and entangling his hands amongst the soft golden-brown locks.  Remus closed his eyes and relaxed against Sirius, who smiled, gently rubbing his hands against Remus's skull.  Remus's hair was much shorter than Sirius's, cut to his ears instead of his shoulders, but Sirius still spent a great deal of time running his hands through the short hair, making sure all bits of leaves and other reminders of their time in the forest were gone.  And then it was Sirius who gently coaxed Remus into leaning his head back, letting his short hair swirl under the water as the shampoo was rinsed out.

            "All clean," Sirius announced, and Remus turned around, smiling slightly and raising an eyebrow.

"Oh really?" Remus purred.  "But that's just the hair.  There's still the whole rest of us, and you, for one, still have some mud right...along...here." He trailed his fingers down the inside of Sirius's arms, tapping every bit of stubbornly persistent mud that insisted on staying on Sirius's skin.  Sirius shivered at the feel of Remus's hands wandering over his skin.

            "You like that, do you?" Remus asked innocently, and, biting his tongue, Sirius nodded.  "You want me to do it again?" Sirius nodded again, and Remus moved closer, delicately running his fingers over Sirius's arms, gently rubbing the mud out of Sirius's skin, then carefully cleaning out the slight cuts he had acquired while running away from the Acromantula.  Sirius sighed and leaned into Remus's touch.  Remus smiled, then moved his hands away from Sirius's arms, running down his chest and back.  Sirius gasped at the sensation of wet hands sliding along his wet body.  The hands slipped to his waist and pulled him closer to Remus, and Sirius moaned aloud.  Then Remus moved away.

            Several things happened that night, leaving them both tired, but sated and happy to be there with each other.

~*~

            The next day, the two boys joined James and Peter at the Gryffindor table for breakfast.  The other two Marauders gave them knowing looks before telling them that they slipped the potion into Snape's morning pumpkin juice.

            Needless to say, Severus Snape walked around for the next several days with orange skin, blue hair, and burping singing purple bubbles.


End file.
